My Blog

"So go ahead and make it rain
You bring the sunshine back again
So go ahead and make it rain
Your tender touches wash away my rain"

So, just an fyi...most of the time the blog title might have nothing to do with the actual blog. Generally the title is just whatever song is playing at first. This song, called "Broken Sorrow" by Nuttin' But Stringz is really good...now the song lyrics that I post inside the blog generally are related and sometimes are from the song, but most times aren't.

I have the biggest smile on my face. I was talking to my ex...or whatever I consider him and we had a loooooong conversation on AIM...being that we're best friends it's nice to have someone like that who's close to me. Eventually we got back on the topic of "us" and he said something that caught me by my heart strings...

...and some chick asked me what I was looking for in a girl once, and I just said your name, and that scared me. It was a shock and also a happy realization.

Talk about crazy right? Okay--maybe not crazy but it definitely made me think. So as we're discussing this we decide that maybe we shouldn't worry about titles and just let it happen. If we're meant to be together, we will be...and if not, it's been amazing having him as a friend and hopefully the friendship will continue to flourish.

However one thing that I have to remind myself is this: the logic of the heart is absurd. My heart is wonderful, it loves EVERYONE, believes in giving people 50 million chances and refuses to understand statements like, "when someone shows you who they are, believe them," especially if what they're showing isn't something quality. My heart doesn't look out for my best interest and I often have to get it in check because if I only followed my heart and didn't pray and logically think things out, my life would be very different.

Some people thing that you will feel unfulfilled if you don't follow your heart, and to an extent that's true...if you have a passion for a certain art, of course pursue it--but weigh the costs. I don't know, for me, music has always been a passion. I love to sing, but my logic pulls me away from seriously pursuing it. I have plenty of friends who are amazing and have incredible gifts in terms of music...however for ME, it just isn't something I can go for. Chalk it as a loss, maybe I would be "happier" if I went for it, but I'm at a point where I don't doubt that there is a plan for me and that if it involves music, it'll work its way in there.

Oh well, that's what happens when you can't tell the future. You kinda just go with the flow of it, stay on the path that you feel is best for you--mine is (hopefully) as close to the plan that God has laid out for me--and go with it.

lovelove.